Tuesday, January 28, 2014

RE: Cannot???

Me: THIS is why I want you to watch Atlanta Housewives...Fights and shit.
Watch The Real Housewives of Atlanta Season 6 | Fighting in Lingerie
Stella: The statement of 'OMG! They're so little!' in reference to sperm is exactly why I cannot add another Housewives show to my viewing.


Tuesday, January 21, 2014

RE: Big Brother (Mark Zuckerberg) Is Watching

Message from Stella:

My recommended pages today on FB go: drag queen, drag queen, PBS Masterpiece Theatre, drag queen, drag queen, fine gardening magazine, drag queen, cats, cats, cats.

Friday, January 10, 2014

RE: A Tummy Knows

Friend (feeling sorry for herself): Sometimes it feels like no one back home remembers me...
Friend's 4 year-old daughter: Mama, I remember you! I also remember that I'm hungry and thirsty, will you get me some food?

Friend: That girl always reminds me of my priorities (or at least hers!)

RE: Not That There's Anything Wrong With That

Message from Stella:

I just opened BitStrips and have the proposal scene ..but it's you proposing to me. Then, further down, you are breaking up with me via BitStrips. It's like a lesbian soap opera.

Monday, January 6, 2014

RE: I can't live or die, moaning for my life, I will always want brains*

Friend: Zombies moan because they don't have control over their tongues.
Friend's 11 year old son: So they're like Miley Cyrus.

*Post's title is a parody of Miley Cyrus' "Wrecking Ball"

Sunday, January 5, 2014

RE: Quality Or Quantity

Scrubs: [Precious Gem] Do you love me?
Precious Gem: Yes
Me: How much?
Precious Gem: Two (and she shows Scrubs two fingers)